long and winding road

The most important lesson to learn in life and with any situation is whether to stay and try to work things out or whether to turn and walk away. Either option gives you a degree of (often intense) pain and anguish, but one will ultimatley provide more joy and prosperity in the long run... Growth requires the temporary surrender of security, and that hurts sometimes, because often the things closest to you provide that security. Theres no need to apoligize for it, no way around it.... its the way life works

I wrote that about a month ago now... Just after my 1st day student teaching and only a week or so after the beginning of the new year. I'm removed enough to put that into perspective now I guess... Six weeks ago I had lost a boyfriend, someone I liked a whole lot, and my best friend pretty much all on the same day. Now I can say it was for the best. It wasn't painless by far, but it was the right decision, not that I was the one making them. It takes someone far from their comfort zone to realize that someone they thought was a great friend turns out to be exactly what everyone has always said they were at the time that their support is needed most. Even further to realize and finally admit that a relationship just isn't working, hasn't been, and can't be fixed.

So in a moment of total and utter lonliness I came to this realization: even if change is for the better, it hurts sometimes. I said it then to make people think I was coping a lot better than I was. I say it now with confidence. (truth be told, its an elaboration of a quote by Grace Sheeny) Had the events of six weeks ago not transpired, I wouldn't have met some of the people I've gotten to know, nor would I have had some of the great experiences I have. Life is certainly an interesting thing, isn't it?